I came across this link while writing my previous post and felt compelled to weigh in on it as well. Get ready for drama titans' fans, Battles at the Receiver Position are-a Brewin! To think that someone wrote that article with some expectation that ANYONE would care makes me sad. But the author of this article (his name's Eric Lister, or Mr. Lister. Go ahead and say it out loud. Mr. Lister. moving on) isn't the only reporter stuck writing about a position battle that, well, no one really cares about. Here are a few other "position battles" that are being grossly overhyped.
Considering how little these battles interest me, I've decided to add in fancy nicknames to each athlete. Now we've got a battle!
Chicago Bears
Position: QB
Combatants: "Vile" Kyle Orton v. Rex "Clipboard-bound" Grossman
What's Brewing:
Both QBs have been given the chance to carry the franchise, and both have fallen flat on their face. This is a battle for which QB is going to be booed first in Chicago. I guess they released their best QB (Griese) in order to make it an even fight? Either way, we're looking at a true feather-weight slobber-knocker.
Considering how little these battles interest me, I've decided to add in fancy nicknames to each athlete. Now we've got a battle!
Chicago Bears
Position: QB
Combatants: "Vile" Kyle Orton v. Rex "Clipboard-bound" Grossman
What's Brewing:
Both QBs have been given the chance to carry the franchise, and both have fallen flat on their face. This is a battle for which QB is going to be booed first in Chicago. I guess they released their best QB (Griese) in order to make it an even fight? Either way, we're looking at a true feather-weight slobber-knocker.
A pictorial biography of Rex Grossman.
New York Jets
Position: QB
Combatants: "Helen" Kellen (weak Helen Keller reference?) Clemens vs. Chad "throws-like-the-kid-from-The-Sandlot" Pennington
What's Brewing:
This is proof that it doesn't matter who's playing in New York; it's still going to get unnecessary coverage. Kellen Clemens is NOT a New York quarterback. He just doesn't strike me as the next Broadway Joe. Unless we're talking about the drunkard Joe, because I could see Clemens needing to toss back a few to forget last season. Chad Pennington is about as ferocious as a box full of kittens.
Kellen Clemens prepares for life after football,
which should be coming up any day now.
Least terrible but still terrible: Pennington's got the experience and as long as the passes aren't further than the line of scrimmage, he's proven to be pretty accurate. I'd still take Vinny T over both of them.
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